Do you know what’s intensely difficult? Having to wait for something that you REALLY want and not knowing if you’ll ever get it. It’s hard to wait. It’s even harder thinking you may spend a ton of time waiting, get what you want… And then realize it’s not what you wanted. Recently this was a topic at my little sister’s youth group; being patient and waiting for God’s time. I’ve been doing that, but sometimes it gets really old.
Right now, there’s a guy that I really like. I’ve liked him for a while now… About 11 months. For a freshman in high school, that’s a pretty long time. But for me… Not really. It’s just different this time. There has never been someone else I’ve known whose company I’ve enjoyed as much. Even though I know I’m not ready for marriage, he is the person who I would want to spend the rest of my life with. Why would I settle for anything less? But waiting plays a big part in these things. I don’t feel like I’m even ready to date at this point. But I still want something. I want to be his best friend.
It’s been really difficult keeping my mouth shut this whole time since I have a tendency of spilling the beans to any boy after a certain period of time. When this happens, two things can occur.
#1- he likes you too and some sort of relationship culminates
#2- he does not and things become… Well, awkward and very painful
Unfortunately, every time I open my mouth, I end up with the #2 response, which, like #2, stinks. Yes, that pun was intended. No, I do not regularly use bathroom humor… Anyways, sometimes I get really impatient. I wake up in the morning and have such a huge sense of longing that I can’t contain myself and let the cat out of the bag. But that isn’t going to happen this time, no matter how long I have to wait. This time I’m waiting for His time. God knows when/if things are supposed to work out one way or the other, and I know he has my best interests in mind.
What do I do to keep my patience? I pray every night before I fall asleep. I pray for my future husband, and myself. I pray for my high school “Prince Charming” (oh the irony…) and his future wife. And then I pray for Prince Charming and I- that it would happen when God wants it, if God wants it, that I will be okay with his plan, and that our friendship will glorify him as long as it lasts. So far, things are going great. God really does know what he’s doing. We all just need to wait for His time.
P.S. If he’s Prince Charming, does that make me the damsel in distress?